It just doesn’t pay to be nice anymore
Now, I know that I can be rude at times. This has been pointed out to me by many people. For the most part, I didn’t care, but I’ve gone too far on occasion, and hurt people because I honestly didn’t think they’d take things so seriously. So I’ve been making an effort to be a kinder, gentler person.
So I just went to the store, which is only a block away. I drove, because I was planning on buying more than I could easily carry back by hand. As I pull out of the store, I see a car with a headlight out going the same way I am. I let it pass, since driving a 53hp Volkswagen means that you can’t pass a one-legged rabbit with palsy. I get behind the car, which pulls into my apartment complex.
I need to park by my apartment to unload my groceries - my garage isn’t near my place - but there are no free parking spaces. The car with the headlight out pulls into a covered space in the building next to mine, which is coincidentally where I usually turn around. So I stop and roll down my window to tell them that they have a headlight out.
The car is occupied by a solitary black woman, who looks to be in her thirties. She looks terrified, and just stares at me. So I turn my car off and walk over. She seems mortified, and still won’t roll her window down, so I point at the front of her car and say, “You have a headlight out.” Looking scared, she nods. I walk back to my car, unload my groceries, and park it in my garage.
Something about this encounter rankles. Why was she so afraid? Yes, it was dark, and I didn’t know her. Yes, I was wearing black, and a black leather coat. But I really don’t think I give the impression that I’m a rapist or thug, and I was just trying to be helpful. While I wouldn’t say there’s no crime whatsoever, this is a good neighborhood; it’s not like I live on Tacoma’s hilltop.
I suppose I could have flashed my brights at her, but that’s so much more ambiguous than just saying, “you have a headlight out.”
And I’m not exactly an invisible resident. While I don’t frequently go that direction, I’m a familiar figure at the rental office here, since they have free coffee and WiFi. When I’m not up there all day, I make several trips for coffee.
Was I way out of line, was she just being cautious, or did she let fear get the better of her?